Sunday, November 15, 2015
So Long Fear
I am afraid. I am afraid of a lot of things actually. I am afraid of pain, bridges, heights. I am afraid of death - not only my own, but of my loved ones. I am afraid that because I have gone back and forth on weight loss so much, that I am unable to do it...how's that one for a big one?
So, how do we get through these fears? Good question - and one that I don't really have an answer to. I can't make fear go away, that is a truth. However, I will not give up. I will continue to try, to move forward, and to change the bad habits and bring in better healthier habits. My scale may not move, but I AM making better, healthier choices - so that in itself is a victory.
"Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away" - Philip K Dick
I am working toward stopping that negative track in my head. The one that says I have failed before and can't do this. The one that says I will never hit my goal weight. I refuse to believe that is reality.
So, how? How do we change the reality that we see and think and hear and feel? Those are all real things right? I am still here at the weight that I am, and believing that I am a thin girl isn't going to change that reality. Or will it? If I tell myself I can't...I can't. If I tell myself, that I am getting thinner, healthier and that my hard work is in NOT in vain...guess what? Its not.
Our minds are a very powerful thing and while I don't even know the half of it I am sure. There are some very good books and resources out there to talk to people how to face their fears, their demons, erase those self doubts. I am not going to name them - because honestly? I don't believe we are a one size fits all kinda people. What works for me, won't necessarily work for you - our minds are vastly different, and our brains will process things differently.
What I will say is this, I am saying so long to fear - so long to those scary health thoughts that flit through my brain that cause me to not want to get up and fight but to go crawl into my bed and hide. Goodbye to the self doubt and self flagellation that hold me back. What fears do you want to get out from under and kick to the curb?
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Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom. Mastering others is strength; mastering yourself is true power’
ReplyDelete(tao te king verse 33)
I agree that looking for a One-Size-Fits-All, solution will lead to disappointment and frustration; but there's still so much we can learn from sharing information with each other, like a favorite book or author. Perspective is everything on this journey. I can hear the chorus of that Beetles song, Hello Goodbye, in my head. "You say yes, I say no. You say stop and I say go go go, oh no. You say goodbye and I say hello. Hello hello" You're saying goodbye to your fears, and I've reached a point in my journey where I'm saying hello. I'm feeling the fear, embracing it, and stepping into it. Two opposite perspectives, yet the result is the same for each of us. We are at a place, where we have the courage to choose what we want for ourselves. Fear will not prevent us from discovering true wisdom and true power.
I'm so happy to be on this journey with you, and I'm in a great place because of you. Without your generosity, without you sharing your inspirations, I would not have known how or where to start searching for my own answers. Thank You!